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The Substitute/Transcript
Episode begins with Ms. Baker watching a TV program about cicadas. Music Narrator: In all of the animal kingdom, the Western blue-eyed cicada has a very unique life cycle. It sits in the ground a very, very long time. "How long," you may ask? This type of cicada hatches every 17 years. Baker's cat, Beauford, hits a book and tries to break the jar where Ms. Baker put her cicadas Ms. Baker: Hey -- No. Bad kitty. Beauford: Meows Next day in school. rings and her friends are talking to Percy Courtlin: Do you have a girlfriend? Percy: No! giggling and Dustin play race cars on Jeff's head Chelsea: Vroom! Ready? Race! and Chelsea throw their cars. Dustin wins Chelsea: Aw, no fair. Too much glue in his hair today. smashs grapes while some kids watch him Sumo: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah! Baker gets in the classroom Ms. Baker: Good morning, class! Today... H-Hey. the mess in the classroom Chatter Thud! Clarence: Ms. Baker, I-I'm so glad you're here! Jeff, um, he forgot his lunch, and -- Jeff: Ms. Baker, now, it's very important I have a non-gluten, high-fiber, low-sodium -- Ms. Baker: Groans Jeff, it's fine, okay? The school will get you another lunch. It's totally fine. Baker goes to her desk, but she stops because Gilben makes her stumble Ms. Baker: Screams Gilben, no roughhousing, okay?! Chelsea: Um, Ms. Baker, I dropped my pencil in the ceiling again. ceiling is shown with a lot of pencils in it. One of the pencils fall in Ms. Baker's jar Ms. Baker: Eek! Chelsea! Don't throw pencils, Chelsea, okay? Here, you can borrow one of mine. Chelsea one of her pencils Clarence: Gasps Giggles Ms. Baker, how come you got bug pets? the jar Clank! Clarence: Chortling Ms. Baker: Clarence, stop it! Don't do that! All right, everyone, back to their seats! - Or it's two buddy stars each. Sumo: Aah! rattle are back in their seats Ms. Baker: Sighs Good. Now, I know we've been struggling a bit through the science unit lately, so I put something together that I think will help. the jar Inside here are two Western blue-eyed cicadas. Everyone say hello to Mark and Stu. All: Hello, Mark and Stu! Ms. Baker: Now, I've been keeping them alive for the past six weeks for a very special lesson. Remember when we were talking about life cycles? This type of cicada hatches every 17 years, okay? Now, these two are still dormant, but they're going to re-emerge in about a week. Feedback Ms. Baker: Ah! Mr. Reese: Attention, Ms. Baker. Uh, Ms. Baker, you're needed in the teachers' lounge - for a very urgent errand. Ms. Baker: Is this about the coffee machine? You can make your own coffee, Jim. I left you instructions on the fridge! Mr. Reese: I repeat, Ms. Baker to the teachers' lounge. Ms. Baker. rings Ms. Baker: Sighs All right, well, that's the bell for Gym. When I come back, we're going to talk about prey, and, uh, predators, and, uh, life cycles, okay? Ms. Baker leaves, the class is a mess again chattering In the teachers room, Ms. Baker teaches Mr. Reese how he can make coffee. Ms. Baker: So, then you put this thing here a jar under the coffee machine and press this thing a button. And there you go. Mr. Reese: Huh? Wait, what? How'd you do that? Ms. Baker: I am not showing you again, Jim. Baker sits down in a chair, in front of Ms. Shoop Ms. Shoop: Oh, boy. I know that look, Melanie. What's going on? Ms. Baker: Sighs I don't know. I just feel overwhelmed. I'm completely behind on my lesson plan. Ms. Shoop: What are you talking about?! Just punch in and clock out! Ms. Baker: Groans I just feel like I'm not getting to them, you know? Ms. Shoop: You're gonna burn out if you keep doing this. Mel, I think you should take a day off. Reese accidentally takes off something from the coffee machine Mr. Reese: Uh, whoops. Ms. Baker: What? No! No. I have to get back to class. stops coming from the coffee machine Mr. Reese: Oh. Oh, no, no. Ms. Shoop: Melanie! I've been teaching for 49 years. Now, I got these two coupons for the Aberdale spa! two coupons that were hidden under her dress It's about time I put them to good use. Ms. Baker: No, I can't. My students need me. Shoop takes Ms. Baker out of the teachers room Ms. Shoop: Call it in, Reese! Ms. Baker: Wait - Stop. Mr. Reese: No, but wait. Melanie. Melanie! Ms. Baker: I-I can't -- Mr. Reese: The coffee. Ms. Shoop: Jim, take charge for once in your life! Make the call! slams Mr. Reese: Ohh. Melanie. Reese gets in Ms. Baker's classroom Mr. Reese: All right, everyone, listen up. Ms. Baker had to leave early today, so I called a sub. Kimby: A sub? I hope Ms. Baker's okay. Clarence: Giggles Mr. Reese, why would you call a sandwich? What? Mr. Reese: No, uh, I said sub, like a substitute teacher. Rattling gasp Percy: Ah! A bogeyman! music plays Julep opens the door and gets in the classroom Mr. Reese: Ah, perfect. Right on time. Everyone, this is your new sub, Mrs. Joanna... no. Muttering Julian? Ms. Julep: Oh chuckles I'm sorry, no, it's - it's actually Ms. Julep. Mr. Reese: Jasmine, of course. So sorry, Ms. Jasmine. Now, everyone, say hello to Ms. Jasmine. All: Hi, Ms. Jasmine. Clarence: Hey, you're not a sandwich. Laughter Mr. Reese: Clarence, that's enough. I want you to show Ms. Jasmine, here... hmm? Julep appears to be behind Mr. Reese Ms. Julep: Oh, sorry, back here. Mr. Reese: Oh, uh, all right I want everyone here to show Ms. Jasmine the same amount of respect that you would show me. Slurps Yeah, maybe -- maybe a little bit more. Oh, all right, then. Just a regular day. Please enjoy your stay. And if you need anything, anything at all, I'll be right down the hallway. 'Kay? Okay. Reese leaves the classroom Ms. Julep: All right. You can do this. Sighs Hello, class! My name is Ms. Julep. Um, I'll be your substitute teacher today. So, let's get started with today's -- her lesson plan book, but her plans fall off the book Oh! Oh, sorry, wow. Okay. Let me just pick these up. I'm sorry. Chelsea: She seems so nervous. What's there to be nervous about? We're just kids. Ms. Julep: Oh, okay. Okay. Whoa, oh, okay. Everything's out of order. Belson: Hey, Ms. Julep? Ms. Baker said we were going to watch a movie today. Ms. Julep: She -- she did? Doesn't say it here in the notes. Chuckles Belson: Well, if Ms. Baker was here, she'd let us watch a movie, right, guys? Camden: Oh, yeah. Laughs She would. Percy: I miss Ms. Baker! Ms. Julep: Uh, me too. Okay, um Let's watch a movie. I'll just set it up. Clarence: Chuckling Huh? start moving Squishing Clarence: Gasps Whispering Hey, Sumo. Sumo: Sniffing Oh, what? Clarence: Look at the bugs! Sumo: Huh? at the cicadas Oh, gross. Ms. Julep: the TV to class Okay, everyone. I'm sorry, let's settle down. It's movie time. on the TV, but some static is shown on the screen Oh! Okay. Um, Channel 3. Is that the Universal channel -- 3? Okay. Um, what if I were to scroll up? Oh, there's no scroll. Chelsea: Um, aren't you supposed to take roll? Ms. Julep: Oh, attendance! Yes, of course. I'm sorry. Uh, let's see. What was your name? Your name? Chelsea: It's Chel -- I mean, Kimby. snickering Ms. Julep: on her lesson plan book Kimby. Yes, I'm so sorry, Kimby. Chelsea: That's okay, 'cause I'm Kimby! Laughter Ms. Julep: Yes. Funny name here. Chuckles All names are funny, when you think about it. and Sumo look at the cicadas Clarence: Do you think that Ms. Baker grew these bugs at her house? music In Sumo's mind. Shrieks Baker makes the cicadas grow in the dirt Ms. Baker: Yes, they're growing! Grow, my little ones! Grrroooow! Thunder Baker is now a cicada too evilly Cackling Sumo: Aw, yeah, definitely. Clarence: Ms. Baker is Mark and Stu's mommy, but she's going to miss them even being born. I'm gonna go find Ms. Baker. I'll be back, little guys. the classroom Ms. Julep: Uh, Mavis? Is Mavis here? Mavis? Belson: It's pronounced Mah-vis. Ms. Julep: Okay. Nathan! Percy: Here. Ms. Julep: Vu. Mavis: sound Ms. Julep: G-Gilben? Camden: Gilben's present. Snickering Jeff: Ms. Julep's book Ms. Baker usually leaves me in charge when she's gone. I'll take it from here. throws the book and sits in Ms. Baker's chair Just call me Music Mr. Randell. Chelsea: Oh. He's not the teacher. Murmuring Scene cuts to the Teachers Room. Reese tries to make coffee just like Ms. Baker taught him Mr. Reese: Push the button. the coffee machine Grunts Ow! Come on. walks on the hall and stops when he sees Mr. Reese punching the coffee machine gets in the Teachers Room Mr. Reese: Roars Grunting Crying Oh. Melanie Clarence: Um, Mr. Reese? Do you know where Ms. Baker is? - She's -- she's missing her bugs. Mr. Reese: Bugs? Is she sick, boy? Now, don't you lie to me. Ohh. Of course. We were fools to think we could replace the lovely Melanie with the beautiful Jasmine. Grunts the coffee machine and breaks the window Let's ride! on glasses cuts to Aberdale Spa music plays Ms. Shoop: Ohhh, yeah. That's -- right there. That's where you gotta do. Ms. Baker: I don't know. I don't know. The teaching books I've read say this generation is different. You know, that they're harder to reach. And then some days, I feel like we're speaking the same language and everything's going great. Others, no one does the homework or even remotely cares. I... Sighs Yeah, maybe I do need to relax. deeply Hmm. appears under Ms. Baker Clarence: Psst! Ms. Baker. Ms. Baker: Aah! Clarence: Aah! Ms. Baker: Clarence! What -- what are you doing here?! Clarence: Well, the substitute -- she's really nice, but Belson made her take out the TV, and then Jeff said that he was going to be the new teacher. Mr. Reese: That's right. Ms. Baker: What is going on here? Clarence: Also, your bugs are starting to hatch. Ms. Baker: What?! The cicadas aren't supposed to hatch for two more weeks! I can't miss this. Brenda? Ms. Shoop: Right there, you'll feel that crunch is there. Crunching Right in there. Ms. Baker: Jim, take me back to school! Mr. Reese: You got it, Melanie! Let's make coffee! continues, Brenda groaning Scene cuts to school. Ms. Baker's classroom is a mess. and laughing Ms. Baker:'''Ah! '''Clarence: Uh... Darlie and Crendle play games on the TV Belson: You're terrible. puts food on Percy Percy: It feels so right. Jeff: The real thing about the Louisiana Purchase was it was wrong. It was cheating everybody out of -- and laughing Ms. Baker: That's it! Brady, put your shirt back on! Darlie, put that fire out! Guyler, get off your desk! Mavis, spit out your gum! I want all eyes on me or it's six buddy stars each. gets up Ms. Baker: I am not joking, you guys! Jeff: Aah! back to his seat are almost getting out of their shells Ms. Baker: Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no. Okay. Hold on, you two, hold on. Okay, class, line up at the door. We're going to learn something about cicadas today if it's the last thing I do. Ants, in line! Let's go, let's go, let's go! chattering are standing in line. Ms. Baker is counting all the kids Ms. Baker: 12, 13, 14 Ms. Julep You are wait, who are you? Ms. Julep: Uh, oh. Chuckles Um, sorry, I-I was just wondering, um -- Ms. Baker: Yes? Wondering what? Ms. Julep: I was wondering if you could teach me how you did that. Because I know the material. I just can't -- Ms. Baker: Wait, are you the sub? Ms. Julep: I'm really sorry. Ms. Baker: Okay, let's just go. Class, behind me! Here we go! leave the classroom Mr. Reese: Yep. Scene cuts to the school playground. Kids are sit in the grass waiting for the cicadas to get out. Ms. Baker: Now, remember, everyone, these cicadas only hatch every 17 years. That's older than all of you, right? And it's a very special life cycle. Julien, why don't you open the terrarium for us? opens the jar Squishing gasping Buzzing finally get out of the jar cheering Music shrieks bird takes one of the cicadas gasp, murmur Kimby: It's eating Mark! It's eating Mark! Chelsea: Laughs That's awesome. Sumo: Laughs Ms. Baker: Okay, guys, class, uh, this is the Arizona Scrub-Jay, huh? One of the cicada's many predators. We're pretty lucky. If you think about it, it's a very good example of the food chain and our next lesson on predators and prey. Shrieks bird leaves Ms. Julep: I think you are a wonderful teacher! Clarence: Oh, oh, Ms. Baker, Ms. Baker. What else does a Scrub-Jay like to eat? Ms. Baker: Well, that's that's a very good question, Clarence. Uh, you see, the Arizona Scrub-Jay comes from a long line of predatorial birds. And, uh, so. Buzzing The End es:La suplente/Transcripción Category:Episodes Transcripts Category:Transcripts